REVIEW: A Good Day to Die Hard [2013]

“I don’t want my life back” While A Good Day to Die Hard may never truly feel like a Die Hard flick, it isn’t for a lack of entertainment. Fans love the idea of John McClane (Bruce Willis) going above and beyond his duties as a policeman to the point of reckless endangerment, destruction of property, and quite possibly clinical insanity because it leads to high octane action and underdog heroics. So used to the formulaic dealings with foreign terrorists on American soil, however, screenwriter Skip Woods decides to throw…

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REVIEW: Lucy in the Sky with Diamond [2013]

“Are you prepared to spend eternity together?” Written in the hopes iconic actor Lou Diamond Phillips would agree to participate, Joey Boukadakis‘ comedy short Lucy in the Sky with Diamond was born. Blindly sending the script to his muse unsure of what the reaction would be, Boukadakis found his love of the man validated once the response came back positively. Phillips loved the script, was flattered by the Being John Malkovich treatment, and graciously accepted the offer to film for two days in the San Fernando Valley and have his…

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REVIEW: Gut [2012]

“You’re supposed to be my friend” The low budget horror thriller Gut is a surprising work in that it isn’t surprising. Written and directed by New York’s School of Visual Arts graduate Elias, this psychological chiller has been released at a perfect time for diehard genre fans tired of the new torture porn style flooding the market. While most contemporary horrors try their hardest to be unique with twists and turns so obnoxiously convoluted that they bore instead of intrigue, Elias sticks to a more naturalistic approach depending heavily upon…

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REVIEW: Brooklyn Castle [2012]

“Only the strong make it to Saratoga” With so many documentaries the past few years focusing on adolescent education and the stressful amounts of work our society has deemed appropriate for kids to undertake rather than allowing them to be kids, a film like Katie Dellamaggiore‘s Brooklyn Castle is a welcome—albeit subtle—spin on the concept. Depicting the struggles of a school caught amidst the failing economy and the pressures put upon children of poor families yearning to witness a member of their clan go to college, the movie tells its…

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REVIEW: Hansel & Gretel: Witch Hunters [2013]

“Never enter a house made of candy” The thing that’s so disappointing about Hansel & Gretel: Witch Hunters is the rather ingenious premise at its back. Taking the classic Grimm Brothers tale and expanding on the results of what escaping an evil witch in the woods as children by burning her alive in an oven is so simple and obvious that it’s a wonder no one had thought of it before (not counting The Brothers Grimm). Credit Norwegian writer/director Tommy Wirkola for seeing the potential in transforming these scared kids…

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REVIEW: Don’t Stop Believin’: Everyman’s Journey [2013]

“I’m living a fairy tale right now” It was Journey‘s album Trial by Fire from 1996 that opened my eyes to their insane library of hits upon entering high school. Here was their first new music since the year after my birth in 1983—”When You Love a Woman” was constantly on the radio, my father had the CD playing at home, and I began delving into the back catalog surprised to realize how many tunes I loved growing up were in fact the creation of Steve Perry and his group…

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REVIEW: More Perfect Union [2010]

“I want extra grits from the kitchen” Sabir (Arish Sahani) says it best towards the end of Matt Porter‘s short film More Perfect Union: “It was just a quarrel.” So often in this day and age we find ourselves reading too much into simple disagreements, unable to look beyond their seemingly trivial catalysts and realize the world has not ended. Whatever argument occurred between Hank (Max Azulay) and his girlfriend Dana (Kate Eastman), it surely wasn’t enough to irreparably tear their love apart. Yes, we may find the need to…

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REVIEW: Open Heart [2012]

“She won’t make it past this year” Director Kief Davidson‘s Oscar nominated documentary short Open Heart is a complicated film. What on the surface shows the journey of eight Rwandan children to the only free cardiac hospital in Africa ends up transforming into a commercial for the non-governmental organization Emergency at its center. This is admittedly a generalization on my part, yes, but one I don’t think can be ignored. No disrespect to Angelique, Marie, Joas, Bruce, Claire, Francine, Louise, or Dorianne, but their plight has kind of been hijacked…

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REVIEW: Beautiful Creatures [2013]

“You can either run or shoot” Just like clockwork the Twilight series has found a successor. Trading vampires and werewolves for witches, authors Kami Garcia and Margaret Stohl‘s Caster Chronicles‘ has hit theatres with much less fanfare but perhaps more intrigue. Gatlin, South Carolina’s secrets are a mixture of Hogwart’s affinity for the Muggle world and Bella’s supernatural-heavy Seattle backyard—the casters possessing a division of light and dark like Voldemort’s Death Eaters and Dumbledore’s students as well as rites of passage similar to those of Jacob’s pack and Edward’s ‘vegetarian’…

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REVIEW: Identity Thief [2013]

“Foxhole! The safe word is Foxhole!” The words “from the director of Horrible Bosses” instilled little hope for me sitting down to Seth Gordon‘s newest work Identity Thief. Screenwriter Craig Mazan‘s name—he of too many asinine spoofs—only made matters worse. No, this road comedy’s saving grace would have to be co-star Melissa McCarthy and the level of hysterics she has unfailingly brought since breaking out in Bridesmaids. The fact her role of Diana was rewritten specifically for her after original intentions called for a man shows how high her star…

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REVIEW: Gunderson’s [2011]

“That sounds like a supermarket” A short film inside a short film, Matt Porter‘s Gunderson’s survives as a standalone storyline from the marginally longer work Argyle. Depicting a week in the life of Max (Max Azulay) as he readies to substitute teach a 7th grade health class while the real teacher takes maternity leave, what should be a fantastic opportunity becomes ruined by an unorthodox diagnosis of a new, rare sexually transmitted disease. Saddled by a VD twitch the day before he is supposed to warn young minds away from…

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